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Apologies, in advance for any colorful language in this very funny piece about the act of calling your bank – with a mischievous twist of honesty and transparency.

This is not unlike the kinds of calls I make to the numerous banks, to which I’m currently in debt, in trying to keep this newsletter and website afloat, after the proverbial jackboot was placed on my neck and when, what had once been a profitable enterprise turned into an unaffordable money pit, when Google suddenly defunded me along with thousands of others, without any warning or explicit or comprehensible explanation.

O joy, O bliss.

Check out the bank’s “hold” music, which is particularly funny.

Contributed by


Alexandra Bruce

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  • I happen to have a soft spot for bankers ………………………… A peat bog in the south of Ireland!

  • BTW, there is no underlying difference between a credit union and a bank. Superficially yes. Fundamentally, no.

  • If at all possible don’t do business with banks. They get their money for free. We don’t. It’s called Unfair Advantage.

    My current S.O. wants to buy a house. I said, okay, go ahead, but don’t include me on the mortgage note. I want nothing to do with it.

  • No need to use so much profanity! If you can’t express your self in a proper way then don’t teach our children or young adult that profanity is acceptable . It is not!

  • So true. Oh, and I really like contacting a (pick a name) corporation who has their phone slammers quote “policy” to me as if GOD wrote with his own finger on a stone table. Shut up! Shut up! Shut up!

  • Hurray! I’m actually getting off my beehind and opening a credit union account, my home city also has its own currency with cash points and everything. Anyone reading this who lives in Bristol UK please do likewise 🙂

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