This is a classy, sophisticated take on wokeness from RedBalloon.work, “the #1 woke-free job board in America.”
War
Find Out What's Really Going On! 
Yeah, then when there really is a real outbreak (as there has been through all of history) the “woke free” will be the first to go. Might “the boy who cried wolf” be part of the plan too?
A little prudence is a good thing.
PERFECT. ….but maybe add “When I grow up to be woke, I want to get paid to do nothing!”