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Alexandra Bruce
May 14, 2014

Aamer Rahman is an Australian stand-up comedian of Bangladeshi descent. Here are some choice words from his stand-up routine:

“I could be a reverse racist. All I would need is a time machine and what I would do is get in that time machine and go back in time, to before Europe colonized the rest of the world, right?

“And I could go to the leaders of Africa, Asia, the Middle East, Central and South America and convince them to invade and colonize Europe, right? And just occupy their land and steal all of their resources and…set up a trans-Asian slave trade, where we exported white people to work on giant rice plantations in China.

Just ruin Europe, over the course of the next couple of centuries, so all their descendants would want to migrate out and live in the places where black and brown people come from – but of course, I’d set up systems, that would privilege black and brown people, in every conceivable social, economic and political opportunity; white people would never have any real hope of self-determination…

“And every couple of decades, make up some fake war, as an excuse to bomb them back into the Stone Age; say it’s for their own good because they’re culture is inferior – and just for kicks, set white people up to colored peoples’ standards of beauty, so they end up hating the color of their skin, eyes and hair…

“If, after hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of years of that, I got onto stage and said, ‘Hey – what’s the deal with white people? Why can’t they dance?’

“THAT would be reverse racism.”

Alexandra Bruce

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